If the Shoe Fits
by King Xander01
Summary: If you started reading from the begining you would know what is happening.
1. Buffy makes a wish

Disclaimer: I do not own Buffy and Co. They belong to the Joss W. Although I wish I did then I wouldn't have to worry about working a sorry ass student worker job. Plus Xander and B would have been together a long time ago.

Summary: Buffy makes a wish. =Þ

Author's Note: This is set 3 months after the Gift. Obviously Buffy did not die. Instead I have it to where when Spike gets pushed off the tower he grabs the Doc just before he falls and takes the runt with him. And then Buffy gets there in time to save Dawn with no blood being spilled. The first couple paragraphs are a little detailed but it get better I promise

Author's 2nd Note: I would like to thank Brooke for Beta reading my fic. It sounds a helluva lot better than when I first wrote it.

Sunnydale, CA September 10th 2001.

As Xander walked through the night, he thought to five days after the battle with Glory.

*Flashback: May 28,2001* 

After he returned to his apartment from a pre- battle meeting at het Magic Shop, he saw Anya standing there next to D'Hoffyrn, instead of being in bed and bandaged up.

Anya smiled at his shocked expression and started to explain. She told him the entire conversation she had with her now current Boss. It turns out that D'Hoffyrn had watched the entire show between them and Glory and had decided to take the opportunity to talk to Anya during her moment of weakness. He convinced her to become a vengeance demon again, by showing her how close she had come to dying just to save a mortal. He added an extra sting to it to make her believe that it was a mortal that still kept her second best in his heart. That last line was what broke the camel's back. 

After listening to the story, Xander remembered pleading with Anya, now Anyanka, to not to listen to the other Demon. To make her believe that all that he said was not true. Which, at the time, Xander truly did love Anya and he was over Buffy. But she refused to listen to him and disappeared, just like that no good bye kiss, or hug, just gone, like she only existed in his mind and his heart. And just as that happened, he did what he always did when he lost someone he loved. He fell to his knees and cry alone ... like the night when he witnessed Jesse fall onto his stake. Like the night he saved Buffy from drowning at the Master's Lair where she still chose Angel over him. Like the day that Joyce died because he truly considered her to be his Mom after the way his parents treated him. He cried .... alone

*End Flashback.*

As he continued to walk through the cemetery he looked at Buffy and thought of how they all tried to comfort him over the summer, each one of the Scbooies tried to help in their own way. Giles helped by trying to get close the young man by inviting him over for tea and crumpets. This act strengthened his respect for his surrogate type father. Willow and Tara came to visit him at his apartment, they had movie nights every Thursday, and had some fun with harmless magiks. They also taught him how to start fires so he could help Buffy on patrols, but he rarely used it because he didn't have enough time to cast the spell. It also surprised him that Spike even tried to help and he had actually become friends with the neutered vampire. But it was only when they were alone that they truly acted like long time friends. Elsewhere they acted like they were at each others throats because Spike wanted to keep his Big Bad image.

But it was really Buffy and Dawn that helped him through his dilemma the most, because each girl knew what it was like to suddenly lose someone you love. Buffy understood his pain because what happened between her and Riley. Dawn understood because she had lost Joyce, just as they were forming a real Mother/Daughter relationship. The three did everything together. It was those actions that made Xander's feelings for Buffy resurface. And that is why he started to go on patrols with her again, so he could protect her like he did in High School, even though he thought Buffy still saw him as her Xander-shaped friend.

Across from Xander, Buffy noticed him looking at her and thought the exact opposite of Xander's last reflection. She truly started to care for him. She did what ever she could to keep him from coming with her on patrol, but her concerns only landed on deaf ears. So instead, she had Giles train Xander so he could have some way to defend himself, but Xander didn't know it was Buffy's idea to have him train.

Just as the two were lost in their own thoughts, they failed to notice five vampires head toward them, until they were right on the two young people. 

The vampires split off, which seemed a little odd first because they looked like they had a plan. One vamp came after Xander while the other four went for Buffy. 

The vamp that came to Xander thought that this guy would be a piece of cake to take out and decided to look at him for a second and smile. That was his last mistake because Xander wasn't going to waiting for him to attack. The young construction worker jumped within range of the demon and staked the overconfident corpse where he stood. 

Satisfied that he dusted fang-face he looked over to Buffy to see how she was doing. Buffy wasn't doing all that well because these vamps were more coordinated, all four were on her at once and began wearing out the Slayer. Xander finally did what he always did when he saw Buffy in trouble, he jumped in. 

He tackled the two vampires on Buffy's right, bringing them to the ground. Thanks to Giles' training Xander rolled back up to his feet before either vamp got up. He quickly staked one through the back, successfully dusting him. But the second vamp had other ideas than joining his compatriot. He used the same tactic that Xander had used to overpower to the Scbooy. 

After Xander tackled those two vamps, Buffy could concentrate on the other two on her left. She took a front snap kick to the first vamp's hip causing him to lose his balance and bend over exposing his back, which Buffy quickly took advantage of staking the bastard. Now the second vamp was little harder because he knew some of his own marital art techniques. 

"Great a Karate Kid Vamp." she thought sarcastically Wait a minute. I have not made one comment about those Vamps since I started fighting, you're losing your touch girl.

His first move was a roundhouse kick to Buffy's right knee in an attempt to break it, but Buffy quickly lifted that leg, causing the blow to hit the arch of her foot. She then kicked back out and caused karate vamp to lose his own balance. As Buffy's foot landed, she used the momentum to throw in a nice solid left hook to the vamp's jaw, and finally staked its undead heart. 

"Wax on, Wax off my ass! It's gonna take forever to get this stain out. God, I knew I should not have worn this shirt on patrol." 

As she said that she turned to see the last vamp lower his head to Xander's neck. Xander thought this was his last moment, and all he could think about was how much he loved Buffy when suddenly the vamp on top of him became lighter. When he looked up all he saw the angered face of a certain blonde slayer.

"What in the hell do you think you were doing! I had those vamps right where I wanted them!" Buffy shouted.

"Yeah sure, Buffy you had them at the point to where they were tiring you out." 

"I did not! I was about to dust one of the Vamps you tackled!"

"Sure! The almighty Slayer was doing just fine." He said will dripping with sarcasm. 

"And as I finished my last Vamp, I turn to see you almost become undead chow. This is exactly why I don't want you going on patrol with me. I can't stop think what I would do if something happened to you!"

"First of all, Buffy I did help! Remember that old saying, there is more strength in numbers, which is exactly what those Vamps had in mind .... Wait minute what did you just say?"

"I ... I mean I couldn't stop to think how Dawn would feel if something happened to you."

"That wasn't what you said. What did you really say?" 

"Argh! Xander, you can be so infuriating. God! I wish ... I wish you knew what it was like to be a Vampire Slayer!"

"Granted." Said a voice from behind them. As they turned, they saw Anyanka smiling evilly.

"What do you mean 'Granted'?" Buffy asked.

"I said, I granted your wish."

"Wait. You mean I am gonna become a Vampire Slayer? Cool."

"No, it's not Xander if I remember correctly only women can become Vampire Slayers." Anyanka said, wearing the same evil grin they first saw her with.

"Oh God! That means I'm gonna become Buffy!?"

  
  


"Something like that. Toddles Lover!" With that she disappeared just like she did at the apartment three months ago. Her last statement made both of the two people cringe with the memory of Angelus.

Just as she disappeared the changes started. First, Xander's black hair started to grow out to about his shoulder. Next, he started to shrink couple of inches. Then he could feel his shoes become to big for his feet. Since he was wearing shorts he decide to look down to see his leg hairs disappear. Suddenly his shoulders shrank and his shirt began to push out like it had balloons underneath. Finally he felt a small tugging at his private jewels. 

After it finally came to an end he had only one thought on his mind as he reached into his pants.

All he could mutter was, "One-eyed Willy has became the Cave of Wonders." With that both he and Buffy fainted. 

End 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	2. Giles meets the mystery women

Summary: So far Buffy made her wish. And now ...Giles finds out who the young women really is. =Þ

Author's Note: This is set 3 months after the Gift. Obviously Buffy did not die. Instead I have it to where when Spike gets pushed off the tower he grabs the Doc just before he falls and takes the runt with him. And then Buffy gets there in time to save Dawn with no blood being spilled. The first couple paragraphs are a little detailed but it get better I promise

  
  


Giles and Willow decided to check on Buffy and Xander after the Research fest they just completed.

They arrived at the cemetery just five minutes after Buffy and Xander's encounter with Anyanka. 

As they scanned the graveyard the two charges saw two women lying on the ground surrounded by five piles of dust. When they saw that the blonde was Buffy they rushed over to scene, thinking the worst had happened. Giles checked on Buffy and sighed with relief to still feel a steady heart beat. 

He looked over to Willow, "How is the young woman?"

She looked over at Giles with a smile and said, "She seems fine. Just a few bruises."

Giles nodded. "Well, we best get back to the Magic Shop with these girls in tow before something else comes out while we are most vulnerable."

Willow agreed. "Ok, but how do you plan on fitting them into your car ... I mean, your car is pretty small."

"Hmmm ... Good point." Then he recognized which cemetery they were in. "Isn't this the graveyard that Spike's Crypt is in?"

"Yeah, it is. Why? Do you want him to help us?"

Much to the Englishman's dismay he nodded.

Willow got up to get the bleached blonde vampire. When she reached the crypt she knocked on the door. 

While she waited she could hear Spike muttering, "Bloody hell, who would dare disturb me while I am watching my tapes of Passions? It better not be that damn Slayer."

Spike opened the doors to seeing Willow giggling.

"What the hell do you want? And what are you laughing at?"

"Oh! I .... uh... nothing I wasn't laughing at you ... I mean we need your help. We found Buffy and this other woman out cold, and we were wondering ... I mean Giles and I ... we were wondering if you can lend us a hand in getting them to the Magic Shop."

"Oh is she hurt? What about Xander? Was he there? ... I mean, I hope not because I wanted to be the one to kill those two when this damn chip is out!" Spike said quickly, trying hide his concern for the Slayer and his only friend in Sunnyhell. He may not be pinning over the Vampire Slayer anymore but he still care about her and Xander after the whole Glory thing.

"Pleeeeease ... I'll get Giles to buy some Brandy or ... or Crown Royal how does that sound?" Willow pleaded, not wanting to be in the cemetery any long than she had too.

"Oh Bloody Hell Alright I will help. Just give me a minute to get my duster and car keys." Well actually I need to turn off my Passions tape as well as get my duster and keys. thought the blonde vampire.

"Oh good! Thanks Spike, I will tell Giles about the Crown Royal ...Oh, and we are over by the entrance to the Graveyard so just meet us there."

Giles turned as he heard Willow walk up to him.

"Did you have any luck with Spike?"

  
  


"Yep, he is going to meet us by the entrance... and I promised you'd buy him bottle of Crown Royal" She looked away embarrassed as she said it.

"What!? Bloody hell. One of these days you people are going to make me die of a heart attack, or make me go bankrupt with your bribes to Spike. Quite frankly, I'd rather die of a heart attack before I lose all my money to Spike and his insipid addictions." 

"Ok ... whatever Giles. Just help me get these two to the Gates so we can get out of here. Tara promised me a sponge bath when we got back to the dorm." When she realized what she said she turned red with embarrassment. 

"I ... I mean we ... she ... I ... oh hell." 

"I ... it quite all right Willow just ... just remember to think before you speak from now on. I have enough trouble trying to get Xander to do the same thing, but I have obviously failed miserably with him." 

Finally, after ten minutes, they got both girls into Spike's car.

"Damn! Why couldn't there be more women like that when I didn't have this blasted chip in my head."

"Oh do shut up Spike, and get in the car!" 

"Yeesh, what got his panties in a rut?"

"Don't worry, Spike, he is just upset because of the way he found Buffy tonight."

"Sure, Sure. Whatever! But I gotta say, Red, something bugs about that other girl. She seems familiar some how."

"Oh really? Have you seen her somewhere before?"

"I am not quite sure, but you know the old undead brain is a bit foggy these days."

"Spike, are starting to admit to your own age!?"

"What! No, you bloody wanker ... I meant it's foggy because of the Toga Parties me and Harris crashed over the summer at the University ... I mean, Sod off woman and mind your own damn business." 

"So that is probably why you recognize her. Because of the parties you and Xander attended. Don't worry Spike I have seen you guys at a couple of those parties myself. Of course, that was before I would get myself smashed." Willow said with a devilish grin.

Spike just looked at her dumbfounded.

"What!? I know how to have fun too." 

  
  


Magic Shop

As three entered Tara greeted them with a smile but soon turned to concern when she saw who they were carrying. 

"Is Buffy alright? And who is the other person? Is she alright?"

Willow turned to her girlfriend. "They are both fine. We found them in the cemetery by some Vampire dust. So there isn't much to worry about." " Did ya finish going over the inventory and today's sales?"

Since Anya left Tara took over her place as Giles' assistant and she had actually done a better job than the vengeance demon.

"Yeah, I'm done." She turned to Giles, "Would you like me to get something so we can clean them up"

  
  


"Ye ... Yes. That would very good. Now, what I would like to know is, what happened with these two tonight?" 

After an hour of waiting Xander wakes up. Giles was the only one at the shop because Spike left to finish watching Passions, and Willow and Tara left to *Ahem* bath.

"Man, what a nightmare. Being turned into a woman by my ex-girlfriend does not make Mr. Happy a happy person" Xander said while he wasn't full conscious yet.

"Are you alright Miss.? Are you hurt in any way?" Asked the concerned Watcher.

"Miss? G-man have you been drinking Irish Tea again?" Suddenly Xander heard his new voice for the first time. 

The next thing Giles heard was an ear-shattering scream coming from the distraught young woman. Fortunately the scream made Buffy's Slayer instincts kick in, causing her to wake up shortly afterwards. 

Wait a minute. Did she just call me G-man? Only Xander calls me that. Giles thought

But before he could ask any questions he saw Buffy rush over to try and comfort the crying women. 

"Shh ... Xand. It's alright. We'll find a way to get you back to normal if the last thing I do. I am gonna make sure that bitch pays for what she did to you." 

After Giles heard and saw the strange scene between Buffy and Xander... 

"Xander!? That is Xander! Dear God! Buffy what happened to him? Who did this to him? I must know everything if I am to make this all normal again." The thought of someone harming the young man, in any way, angered him deeply. He had finally been able to get the old Xander back after what Anya did to him. But before he could get an answer he heard Buffy yelping.

"Ow Ow ... Xander, Honey, you need to lighten up on the hugging. Remember you have the strength of a Slayer now and your favorite Chosen One needs to breath" 

Xander was reluctant enough listen through his sobs to release Buffy.

"Sorry ... *sniff* ... It just that I've got all these weird emotions going through me ... I can't stop crying ... *sniff* ... but I feel so energetic that I can run all the way across town and back without breaking a sweat ... and ... and I got to peeeeee..........

  
  


On the next episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer - Giles gets his answers, Willow and Tara drool and Xander learns how a few things. 

  
  
  
  
  
  



	3. Xander learns a few things

Summary: So far Buffy made her wish. Giles finds out who the young women really is. 

And now.... Giles gets his answers to Xander's dilemma and the Xandman learns a few things

Author's Note: This is set 3 months after the Gift. Obviously Buffy did not die. Instead I have it to where when Spike gets pushed off the tower he grabs the Doc just before he falls and takes the runt with him. And then Buffy gets there in time to save Dawn with no blood being spilled. 

2nd Note: I would like to thank my beta reader Brooke, she has helped me perfect my grammar and Betaing it so quickly. And I would to say I am sorry about the long wait but I had some e-mailing problems when I tried to send to Brooke. 

  
  


Giles was pacing frantically, waiting for Xander to calm down enough so he could get the whole story. But, when it came to the welfare of 'his' children, patience wasn't he best suit.

"Buffy please ... I must know what happened."

Buffy sighed "Ok ... Xand are you ok enough for me to let you go so I can explain things to Giles?" Xander just nodded unable to say anything for fear of hearing his voice again.

"Here is what happened. Me and Xander were on patrol. When we were rushed by five Vamps. One split off to go after Xander while the other four came for me. Some how, Xander staked the Vamp that came after him. As always he jumped in ... you know, when you think about it's kinda cute that you have someone come to your aid no matter what..." She said as she started to veer off of the topic.

"Buffy!" Giles shouted.

"Oh right. Sorry ... Anyway Xander tackles two of the vampires on my right and LUCKILY staked one before it got back up. Then the other one tackled him to the ground and started to overpower him. Since I only had the other two to take care of I finished them quickly. Much to my annoyance, I turn to see the last vamp almost turn Xander into a midnight snack. ...."

Xander said, "So I did help you and you admit it. Wait. You saw all that, and were still able to fight?" 

"Oh I did not! I told you before, I was handling it better than you were with that last Vamp! And yes, I did." Buffy shouted.

"Excuse me, Buffy, I am going to help put an end this childish argument and say from what I have heard so far I would say that Xander did help ..." 

"You see, G-man here agrees me." 

"If you would kindly let me finish, Xander, you would hear I have more to say. I was going to say you did help, but you still put yourself at risk of getting hurt. Now, please, can you get to the part where Xander became Miss Teen USA."

"Oh I forgot ... Well, that argument we just had was part of the reason..." Buffy looked away slightly embarrassed, "I am kinda the reason Xander is a girl ... I blurted out that I wished he knew what it was like to be a Slayer and suddenly, Miss'I want have to sex, Xander' appears and says she granted my wish."

"Yeah, and the next thing I know is I am in Hootersville." Xander added

Giles started to whip his glasses as he thought of a way to fix this, while giving Xander a look of annoyance with his last remark. He thought, God, ever since that boy has gone out with that 'bitch' as Buffy puts it. He has developed less tact than Cordelia. 

"Well, the best thing we can do is research on Anyanka and maybe find a counter spell or find some way to get her to change you back."

"That's great and all. As much as I love to research to find a way to bring back Willy. Umm ... I still gotta pee, sooooo.... Buff would you like show me how its done." After he said that he started to smile.

"God Xander! Even in a time of crisis, your mind is still in the gutter. I will help you though ... not show, but explain, how it's done."

"As much I would hate to miss hearing you two banter about restroom manners, I still need to close the shop so I can get home because the books I need are at my apartment."

Buffy smirked, "Ok lets go Xand. Let's see if I can explain to you how to pee like a woman without having to use pictures."

"Hey! I'll have you know that my adult magazines have words in them too. Well, most of them anyway. And, of course, they don't show or explain how a woman relieves herself."

"That's a little too much information Xander. Remind me the next time I am at your apartment to get a search warrant so I can find, and SLAY those said books. No wonder your mind is always in the gutter" 

"Let's just get to the bathroom ... Please!"

  
  


The Bathroom

Buffy was sitting on the counter, when she heard the flushing of a toilet behind the stall door.

Xander walked out and started to head for the door.

"Ahem"

"What?"

"Aren't you forgetting something?"

"What am I suppose do primp myself like the other women do before leaving the bathroom?"

"No, your hands."

"My hands? Sure, they are a little slim but that's nothing to worry about."

Buffy just rolled her eyes "No, your suppose to wash them."

"Oh sorry ... normally I wash them after each use, but I was kind of preoccupied with the idea of not having Mr. Willy" 

Xander walk over to sink to wash his hand. As he was washing, he finally got a good look of the woman he now was. 

"God! I almost look like Cordelia." After farther inspection he saw his hair reached his shoulder blades. His cheekbones were a little higher, and his eyes were a little rounder. He had a button nose that matched with the rest of his face. His chest looked like someone pitched pup tents under his shirt. His arms, shoulders and waist were slimmer. His hips were wider. He also noticed, as he continued to 'examine', that his skin felt like smooth silk.

"Alright Xander, that's enough ogling for one night. Giles still needs to close the shop and start researching. But damn, you're right, you do look a lot like Cordelia." 

After they got out the bathroom, Buffy noticed that Xander's pants started to slip. Before she could say anything they fell down causing Xander to fall face first in bucket of demon slime that Buffy had previous removed the night before. 

"And I see we need to take you shopping now too." All Buffy could do was grin at the thought and giggle at the scene before her.

"Oh no nononononono ... all I gotta do is tighten my belt see." After letting go of his pants they slipped down again. "And Thanks for laughing with me when I fell into that bucket of slime."

Giles chose this opportunity to speak, "Oh and Xander, since you have the powers of a Slayer I would like to test them. So I would like you to be here at 5:00 am sharp. If the tests are a satisfactory, I like use this opportunity to its full advantage with having two slayers again. "

  
  


*Groan* "Always the Watcher, aren't you G-man?"

"Oh ... I see this going to be fun after all." Buffy said with devilish grin. 

"Oh, I would like you to here as well, Buffy, so you can train while I run the tests on Xander. And quite possibly train with him if it goes well" 

"Awww ... Giles you always know how to spoil my fun." Buffy pouted as they locked up the shop.

  
  


I know I promised Willow and Tara but I had to end it here. So tell me what you guys think.


	4. The plot thickens and more learning for ...

Summary: So far Buffy made her wish. Giles finds out who the young women really is. Giles got his answers to Xander's dilemma and the Xandman learned a few things. And now ... D'Hoffyrn has some plans and more education for Xander.

Author's Note: This is set 3 months after the Gift. Obviously Buffy did not die. Instead I have it to where when Spike gets pushed off the tower he grabs the Doc just before he falls and takes the runt with him. And then Buffy gets there in time to save Dawn with no blood being spilled.

My thanks to my Beta Reader: Brooke and to those who have given my feedback: Michael, Xandman, Wicked Raygun, Candy, Prince Charon and Draxar. If I left anyone out email me and I'll be sure to add you to the list.

  
  


D'Hoffyrn's Dimension

D'Hoffyrn just smiled at Anyanka's work. That's my Demon. Although, I had to lie to her to get her back, but isn't that what demons do to get what they want.

Just as he finished his thought, Anyanka entered the room smiling. "Ah ... my favorite vengeance demon. I just saw what you did to your ex. and let me tell you I was rolling on the floor at his reaction. 'Cave of Wonders', I still can't get enough of it." He said chuckling 

Anyanka was ecstatic as his reaction, "I take it you were pleased with my deeds." She said a little to enthusiastically.

"Yes, I am. It's been awhile since I have had a good laugh at a human's expense. And this is just the diversion that Sinplock needed to obtain the elements for the Slayer's demise."

"Sinplock!? But D'Hoffyrn, I thought you hated that filthy demon with all the seven circles of hell put together." 

"Ah ... There is so much that you have missed over the past my dear man hater. We have put our difference aside, for the time being, to achieve a goal that some many other demon's have fail at and that is .... the DEATH of the SLAYER!"

"THAT'S IT! Man, I have seen snails with more originality. I mean, sure you could go after the Slayer, but where the fun in that. After you kill her, that is if you do, there will always be another one to take her place."

Needless to say D'Hoffyrn was furious. "WHAT GIVES YOU THE RIGHT TO INSULT ME, YOU LOWLY LITTLE CARCASS!!!"

"Gees chill D. If you would have let me finish I would have said I had a better idea. That is, if it is to your approval my Lord" Anyanka said calmly, knowing full well the other Demon could strip her of her powers with a snap of his fingers. Hmmm ... stripping ... it has been awhile since I good sex romp ... D wouldn't be a good choice either. His stick is so small that he once saw a roach's and became insanely jealous that he ordered every roach in this dimension to be exterminated. Talk about ego. Come to think of it why is every ruler's ego so impossibly huge but to be squashed by a lesser Demon or human for that matter......

"Anyanka ... ANYANKA!!" D'Hoffyrn shouted.

His screams brought the vengeance demon out of her thoughts.

"Finally ... Now, what is that you propose?" D'Hoffyrn said finally starting to calm down.

"Well, if you want to get famous off the Slayer's death. How about you do it by making every demons dream come true, by making Buffy and the other one, the last Slayers to ever exist?"

  
  


Earth's Dimension: The Summer's House

Buffy's alarm clock goes off. She wake up to feel an arm wrapped around her waist. She relished the warm feeling of Xander lying next to her. But that was before she remembered what form Xander's body now had and she quickly but gently removed the arm from her waist. 

This little movement woke the Xandman up from his dreams. "Come on mom give me ten more minutes." 

  
  


"Xander, you need to wake up. We have to get ready to go to the Magic Shop so Giles can to his insane test. And then we can take you shopping." Buffy said with more enthusiasm than she usually has at 5:30 in the morning. 

"Alright, alright all ready. I am up." Xander grumbled. "I still don't see why we couldn't have wild monkey sex last night, granted we would be missing an important 'member' of the group but I wouldn't mind improvising a little." He said wiggling his eyebrows.

"Xander, you have just proved that the only thing that goes on in men's minds is sex. And if I did allow that event to happen last night. I would have been with Willow by now." She said laughing. "That is also why I didn't want you going home by yourself last night. God, only knows what have happened if I didn't." 

"Ok, good point. That would really kill my chances at getting you in bed when I get Mini-me back. But I got to ask one question why do we have to get up at 5:30 in the morning if we have to be a the shop for 7:00?" 

"Xander, shut up. And the reason, why 'we' have to get up early is because you are a girl now remember, it will take longer than thirty minutes for you to get ready. Which entitles you taking a bath and drying your hair that will take at least fifteen minutes to dry, then we have to find you something to wear because you are not going out in that slime covered outfit from last night."

"Ok! Ok! Geez. Being a woman sucks if you have to get up this early everyday. Now, can I get something to eat before I take a bath?"

"Sure, there's cereal in the cupboard. But don't eat to much, because you will get cramps while working out at the Magic Shop."

Five Minutes Later....

"Ok, I am done with breakfast. Can I go take my bath now my Queen? And Damn, when did a hurricane come through your room while I was downstairs?" Xander asked jokingly.

"Yes, you can. No a hurricane didn't come through here I am just have trouble finding something to you to wear, but I should have something for when you come out." She said

"Ok, I gonna go now." He said as he turned to leave. 

"And Xander don't try to ogle too much when you take off your clothes because I still need to take my bath." She said.

He stuck his head back in the door, "Ok, hey, why come don't you join me to make sure I am doing it right? We can imagine we're in a women's prison shower." He asked playfully.

"Xander, I told you I don't swing that way remember. I am saving myself for Mr. Willy.... da I ... I mean I am saving myself for ... for some Mr. Willingness to come along." She said quickly trying to hide her last outburst.

"Sure, Buffy, Sure." He said as he headed of the bathroom. 

  
  


An hour later....

"Ok Buffy, I managed to get my hair dry but damn that takes too long. Did ya find something for me to wear? And I still don't see why I can't use my clothes."

"Yeah I did. I found two outfits." She said

"Well lets see what hell you can put me through." He looks on her bed. He see two outfits. The first one looks like a black workout clothes, it had a hooded top that probably would stop a inch above the navel and tight cotton shorts. The second one was a pair of leather pants with tank top that said "Girls Rule"

"Um ... This is all I could find. The jump suit is Cordelia's. The pants and tank top are Faith's."

"Gee ... I have such a great selection that says, 'Ogle Me' to every guy in Sunnydale. Why don't you pick for me? I don't trust my judgement since I still have my bright and shiny personality." He said with a hint of mischief and sarcasm.

"Ok. If you insist. I would pick ......" 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	5. Xander get tested

Author's Note: Ok I am soooooo sorry it took me this long to write this but my damn laziness got in the way, then school started then work, I am still pressed for time as I help build my parent's house. So I will try to get these parts out. 

My thanks to my Beta Reader: Brooke and to those who have given my feedback: Michael, Xandman, Wicked Raygun, Candy, Prince Charon, Draxar, Jonathan, Shawn, Lysander, and Rose. If I left anyone out email me and I'll be sure to add you to the list.

5:45 a.m.

Xander continued to try and pull down on the workout clothes but they kept moving back to their mini position of revealing. 

"I still don't see why you chose this instead of Faith's clothes she seemed to do fine in them."

"Well, first off, Xander if you wore Faith's clothes you would be more restricted in movement. You aren't use to wearing tight leather pants and they would slow you down as Giles tests you. Secondly, I am sure you don't want to get chaffed as you start to sweat and having that leather rubbing against your legs. Third, that top gives you more support for you newly acquired assets and it will help with your balance than Faith's flimsy shirt would. And finally I am still taking you shopping for clothes." She said grinning.

"Ah come on Buffy can't we just use my clothes. I just need to get a smaller belt." Xander whined.

"Nope, no can do. Once the Slayer mind is set, it follows through. SO I would shut up if I were you unless you want me to take you shoe shopping as well."

"Dear God, NO!!! You wouldn't?!"

"I CAN and I might." She said as opened the door to the magic box.

Giles heard to his two charges come in while search through one of his ancient tomes. "Ah Buffy, Xander," he said as he looked at his pocket watch. "Right on time, I have the training room set up. So if you would please go and warm up I will be with you shortly."

"Umm . . . Giles, are you sure I should take the test? I mean tests and me don't mix that well. Just look at my grades from High School." Xander asked a little nervously.

"Nonsense Xander. I am sure you will do fine, just relax and it will all be over in three hours."

"Yeah Xand. You can do it and I will be there to make sure you don't get hurt or hurt someone. If I know the glorified tweedmeister here, he will want to test your weapons' skills."

"Cool weapons. HEY Wait a minute! Did you say three hours?!"

"Yes Xander, I did, is that a problem?" Giles asked. 

"Damn skippy it is! There ain't no way in hell I am missing my Power Rangers rerun. Today is the day Tommy becomes the White Ranger. So unless you have a TV, you can kiss my butt goodbye mister because I won't be here."

"Eww Xander! Bad mental image." 

"Err . . . Hehe . . . sorry. Anyway I am serious Giles no PR no tests. It's bad enough I have to spend my weekend as a girl but having me take a test on a Saturday and missing Power Rangers is threading on thin ice my friend."

Giles sighed. "Alright Xander I will let you watch this infernal show but we will continue the test after that. *Damn it! Teletubbies comes on at the same time! Blast that Saban! If he had stuck with the original characters instead changing the story and the characters so many freakin' times. I wouldn't be missing the only True British Television show. * Giles thought. 

  
  


"Umm . . . G-man . . . Earth to tweed. The Teletubbies have landed." Xander said as he waves his hand in front of the former watcher. 

"Teletubbies! Where?! I must meet them!" He shouted.

Buffy and Xander both stared at him a little worried. 

"Oh Drat! I spaced out again. Did I mention something about Teletubbies? If I did, I was only referring to them because the Council actually believes that they are real and I was once apart of the research team." Giles half lied. 

"Oookay. Giles, for the record, Tbs are the scariest and most disturbing display of children's TV I have ever seen. I think they are the reason kids this days have such a low IQ and it is not because of violent cartoons." Xander voiced his opinion of those things.

"Yeah I am with Xander on this one. I caught Spike watching."

"Really? That proves that the show is created by evil megalomaniacs hell bent on taking over the world." 

"Well, shall we get started on the trial." Giles said trying to change the subject from his beloved television show.

"Yeah, let's get over with. The sooner we finish the sooner I can take Xander shopping for clothes." Buffy grinned.

"Damn it, Buffy. I was so looking forward to ending this test early. Now I am starting to rethink my strategy." Xander groaned as they headed for training room. 

  
  


Three hours and one Power Ranger Rerun later

Buffy and Xander were whipping the sweat from their thirty minute sparring session. Giles was getting water from the refrigerator.

"I must say Xander you did an excellent job. You have proven to have the skills and abilities of a Slayer especially sparring against Buffy."

"Thanks for the encouraging words G-man but I think I got my butt whooped by the Buffster."

"Xander you may have lost to Buffy at each round but you must look at the underlining meaning of your match."

"Yeah Xand. I was hard pressed against you in conventional fighting. You fought so well that I had to improvise to beat you. The other reason I won was because I have more experience in fighting."

"Quite true Buffy. This is new to you, Xander. Your body is adapting to the changes and powers you now possess with proper training you would be as good or maybe even better than Buffy." Giles said.

"Yeah, no kidding. The whole having breast thing is throwing me for a loop with all that bouncing and hair slapping me in the face."

"See. I told you the workout suit was better. If you thought that bouncing was bad, try fighting without support and then you can talk about irritating." Buffy stated.

"Xander, there is one more test you must perform." Giles said from across the room. 

"Great more tests. Well, Giles, go ahead and throw it at me. What's next?"

"This." He said as he threw a dagger toward Xander's head. 

  
  


Xander and Buffy just stared in shock as they looked at the dagger that he stopped an inch from his face.

"Excellent Xander! I knew you could do it!" Giles cheered.

Xander's face slowed started to contort in anger as his brain started to function again. 

"Excellent?!" He shouted as he stalked the British man, who in turn started to back into a bench. "Giles, you think throwing a knife at my head is a great test for me then you are sorely mistaken! If you EVER do something like that again. I SWEAR by all that is holy I will make sure you know what is like to lose your manhood . . . PERMANENTLY!" As he said venomously while stabbed the dagger into the bench between the former watcher's legs then turning to leave. All Giles could do was gulp at the new Slayer's promise.

"Woah! Deja vu." Buffy said before her on anger started to surface. "Giles! What were you thinking whatever happened to no more of the Council's insane tests?!"

"I am . . . I am sorry Buffy. I got so excited I didn't realize what I was doing. I guess I wasn't thinking through all the prospect of temporarily having a second Slayer again."

"Well think harder next time. And it isn't me, who you should apologize to." She said as she looked in the direction her friend left. "I am going to see if he is ok. We will talk more about this later."

"Yes. Please do that and I will continue to look for a cure. It is the least I can do after what I did."

"All right, why don't you call Willow and see if she can help." She said as she left. 

  
  


* * *

Author's Note: For the record, I did like the Power Rangers! That was until Saban started changing the characters, the storyline and using the same plot. ARGH!!! The other reason I no longer like it was because it was one of the reason's Sonic the Hedgehog was cancel from Saturday morning cartoons. As far as Teletubbies goes I am siding with Xander on this one. 


	6. Xander get another lesson

Magic Box

Buffy entered the main room, and she saw Xander looking out the window with her arms crossed. 

"Hey. You ok?"

"Yeah, it just one other thing to ruin my weekend. I mean hey it's not every day you get a knife thrown at your head. Oh wait, on a second thought, with stuff we do, there usually is something that gets thrown at me." Xander answered.

"Hey that's not true! I am usually the one that gets the pointy objects thrown at me! And beside Giles is feeling very guilty for what he did. So now is a really good time for you to score on his guilt. I usually ask him for his credit card but only end up with a cookie. But for you I would try to max out on his regret for some of that Watcher cash." Buffy said as she tried to cheer him up. 

"Nah. I am not much of one to sponge off of other people's guilt. Besides, he got enough on his plate trying to find my cure."

"Xander Harris! Are you implying that I mooch off of Giles too much?!"

"You said it, not me." The new Slayer said with a small smile.

"Yeah, Yeah, Yeah. Laugh it up Twinkie. I will get you back soon enough. I seem to have made you forget about the pointy object. Wahoo! Score one for the SLAYER!" She said as she pumped her fist into the air. "Buffy Summers: One! Xander Harris: Zero!"

"So you have but you forget I have been making you smile for six years running. So you have a looong way to go before you can match my score, Summers." He answered smiling some more.

"Oh Poo! Spoil my fun, will you?" She mock pouted. "I will out score you even if it means getting you in bed and making sure you never frown again! ... Oh Crap!" She said as smacked her forehead.

"What was that? Did I hear you right, Buffy? I am flattered that you would find my body irresistible even when I am a woman, but be careful what you wish Buff you just might get it." He smirks at her embarrassment.

She quickly tries to change the subject. "Hey, Giles said he was going to call Willow and Tara over for help with the research. Maybe we can have a little fun with them. After all you said your body was irresistible. Lets put your words to the test with some real lady lovers."

"You know that would be some fun. I am pretty sure they won't have a clue as to who I am. But first I need to get out of these clothes. How am I going to seduce a woman if I stink?"

"Well you could use the shower in the back office. I do it all the time after workouts." 

"I was wondering how you always stayed fresh even after beating Giles to pulp. After I get cleaned how am I going to go about getting Wills all hot and bothered?"

"Xander, Xander. It's a shame Anya couldn't give you the knowledge of what women want in any partner." 'Sigh' "Unfortunately, you still think like a man so I just have to coach you in knowing how to really get a woman going. HOPEFULLY, it will be a very good learning experience."

"Hey! I will have you know Anya thought I was a Viking in the Sack. Thank you very much. Oi! I just embarrassed myself too."

"It's all right Xand. 'Share and share alike' as Faith would say. At least, now I won't feel as bad about my comment from earlier anymore. Now go get cleaned up so I can show you how to really make those two wiccans wet themselves." She said with a Cheshire grin. 

  
  


30 minutes later ...

Xander walks out in boxer shorts and an oversized white T-shirt. The shirt wasn't helping with hiding much of Xander's new assets. 

  
  


"Where did you get those?" Buffy asked.

"Oh these? I remembered I kept some spare clothes in the office in case of emergencies. I know what you are thinking why didn't I get these last night. Well, would you be thinking of a lot of things if you were in my position."

"Oh." She said. "Anyway since you are partially dressed. Lets get started shall we? First I will explain to you my idea of the different levels of beauty women can have. The second will be how the walk and act like woman with a purpose. The first level of beauty is au naturale." When she said that Xander looked at her kind of funny. "No not naked Xander! Geez, is all men think about is sex?"

"Pretty much. That, food, and sleep." Buffy just shook her head and continue her lesson. 

"Anyway, the au naturale level is basically a woman who can look beautiful with just casual clothes like jeans and t-shirt and no make-up. The next level is the subtle sexy. This level you have a minimal amount of make-up usually a little foundation, a light colored lipstick, and little bit of mascara to help bring attention to your eyes. The clothing would be sexy yet conservative. An example would be a silk blouse with a slight V- neck and skirt that is about 3 inches above the knees. The third level is daring sexy. Here you add a bit more make-up like a darker lipstick, a little blush, and probably some eye-shadow to go along with the mascara. The clothes is, well, more daring. You might have a dress that would be bare back with a bigger V-neck and the hem would come up about an inch or two higher with slit on each side of the dress. The final level is just plain dirty. Here, you throw caution to the wind. The makeup is heavier and the dress would hit the mini category."

"Ok, so which one are we going to do?" Pleasedon'tletbethelast.Pleasedon'tletbethelastone. He silently prayed.

"Since you technically still think like a guy, we are going to go somewhere in between the second and third level." 

Just then some clothes suddenly appeared with a letter addressed to Xander with Anya's handwriting on it. Buffy and Xander slowly worked their way to the items. Xander picked up the letter and started to read out loud.

"Hey Loverboy,

I was watching you and the bottle blond planning to have some fun with the two wiccans. I thought I might pitch in and give you a little something that might help. 

Tootles,

A.

Buffy decided to ignore the comment and started to lift of up the dress. Xander was the first to voice his opinion. 

"Oh boy."

"It's perfect!" 


	7. Oh My! That's a dress!

A.N.: And No I did not rip off Canadian Satan. I had the idea first. If you don't believe me ask Brooke my beta reader and author of many cool B/X fics. Or you could ask the wonder folks at BXFanfic Group. And for the newbies and to appease the List Rents I am going to add a link to the story on FF.net so you can read the first couple of Chapters. 

I know I really late in getting this part done and I apoligize to the Readers but my muse is fickle lady. She likes to come in 6 months spurts. :-)

Special Thanks: To Brooke, Happy B-day Girl! I wish you many more drunken nights of Vegas fun! 

If the Shoe Fits 7/?

Magic Box

Xander just bowed his head in defeat. Buffy had insisted that the dress was perfect for their little scheme. It was a knee length, spandex/polyester blend so it is form fitting, backless, black with spaghetti straps, and a crowl neck. The dress is tight enough so that it can be worn without the breasts flying out, but the neck line helped show off a lot of smooshed cleavage. 

"I still don't see why I can't wear something with more coverage and more layers. The lack of material on the back is really giving me the chills."

"Zip it, Xan. I will have you know that this is what women have to endure just to catch a man's eye. Plus, this dress is too good to pass up. We need to get started on the other requirements of our excursion. Now sit down so I can work on your make-up while I explain it to you." Buffy's resolve face forced the poor guy turned girl into a seat at reading table.

"Now since you have slayer powers you would be amazed at how well this keeps your body in peak condition. Especially around the face, so you won't have to worry about oily skin or pimples. Basically, it enhances your natural complexion. So you won't have to worry about applying foundation. Now relax your lips so I can apply some lipstick." She said as she picked up a tube of red lipstick. 

"Whoever invented make-up should have been drug out into the street and shot." Xander mumble before complying with Buffy's request.

"Next, we have the mascara. As I mentioned before this mostly to bring attention to your eyes. I am only going to apply a light layer to your eye lashes. Now try not blink or you will mess it up." She gently started to brush the applicator to the new slayer's eyelashes after about three strokes on each eye. 

"You are lucky Xander. It normally takes about ten to fifteen minutes to do. But since we're only doing this for Willow we don't need as much. Next we need to do your hair and no, simply putting it in ponytail is not going to work. We're going for the sexy look, remember?"

So Buffy spent the last couple of minutes primping Xander's hair. The style looked a lot like Cordelia's in their sophomore year. It was falling in loose curls with several tendrils hanging around her face. 

"Umm ... Where did you get all that stuff to do my hair?"

"Oh that? I got it from my workout bag. A girl's got to come prepared you know. Now, let's take at look at you and see the finished product." 

Buffy stepped back to get better look. She nodded then motioned for the new girl to turn around to get full inspection. The elder slayer whistled. 

"If I wasn't chasing guys Xander, you'd be at the top of my list." She teased. "Now we got to think of a pose for you when they come in."

"How about I just lean over the checkout counter looking like I am browsing for something to buy?"

"Oh good idea! Let's see if you can lean like this." She demonstrated for Xander. As she leaned against the counter her tush was sticking out with one leg bent and the other straight and then she switched legs so make her butt move to the other side.

Xander gulped at her posed. Buffy saw his action which made her shiver a little seeing a girl oogle her even though it was Xander.

"Like what you see?" He shook his head vigorously. "Well that's how I want you to do it" She said giggling at his denial. "Now lets see your moves, Sista!"

Xander had to take smaller steps because of the dress and the heels. He got to the counter and did the same thing Buffy.

She whistled at him. "I am jealous. You make it look better than I did." 

After she said that they hear a car pull up and see Willow and Tara exiting the car. 

"OH! They are here! Shoot! We haven't got time to go over what you are going to say. Ok ... Umm ... Just say what you would say to get a woman all hot and bothered."

  
  


"Wait! Where are you going to be?"

"Behind the counter. Hurry and get into that pose they are almost to the door."

Willow and Tara walked in discussing what Giles wanted their help for.

"You know, it might about what happened last night. When we found Buffy and that other girl. He might want us to research on some ritual or something that might have gone on." Willow inquired. 

When she didn't get an answer from her girlfriend. She turned to see her staring ahead. As she looked in that direction she saw one of the aforementioned women leaning over the counter. The woman was in dress that would make both girls have very satisfying dreams for the days to come. Their imaginations were increase another level when she moved her position. Both were taken out of their revere when the lady ahead turned to them and smiled.

"O ... Oh! You are that girl from last night." Tara finally spoke. 

"Yeah I am." She answered in voice dripping with honey. "I came by thank my rescuers. My blonde hero isn't here but Mr. Giles said you helped watched over me. So I wanted to say thank you." The brunette started to walk toward Willow in way that made her jaw drop. When she reached the resident Wiccan, she was extremely close. "So ... Thank you." She whispered before give her a mind blowing kiss. After about a minute watching Tara spoke up. 

"Hey! What do you think you are doing?!"

"Oh, I didn't forget about you honey." She said as she left Willow feeling like Jello and surprisingly perturbed because she swore she's been kissed like that before. When Xander reached Tara he decided to give Tara chaste peck on the cheek. He didn't want to scare her too much besides he was having too much fun with Willow's reaction. All the while Buffy was silently giggling hearing Willow stuttering.

"Xander!" Willow shouted a little to loudly. Her shout caused Tara, Xander, and Buffy to jump. "That's where I felt that kiss but that's impossible. Hey! What going on here?!" She finally heard Buffy's full blown laughter. Giles ran out of the training room to investigate the racket. He found Buffy on the ground laughing. Willow with a very confused look and a little flushed. Finally, he looked over to Tara and Xander to see the witch blushing and Xander in a rather skin tight dress.

"Oh Bloody Hell!" 

  
  
  
  



End file.
